There are a few ways to describe the time when period strikes a girl, the monthly thing .

Here’s a collection of the terms that I’ve found / heard / noticed all these while. Welcome you all to add to the list.

This thing all started from a friendly chat with a friend, when my friend asked another colleague whether she’s joining us for a badminton game. Apparently she’s having it and she mentioned to my friend and my idea for this article immediately sparks off!

So today, i’m gonna write bout this, here goes :

Some common terms for Period/Menstruation

Using Female Relatives

Auntie Lai Liao (Auntie Arrived)
Sister visiting today (Sister Lai Liao)
Granny came (never used lah, granny where got, already menopause liao)
My Girl is here
Little miss came over
My cousin’s in town
Woman’s thing

Using Date/Calendar Related
Beginning of the month (A more subtle way of saying that)
First day of the month (similar to Beginning of the month)
Calendar day starts
My Cycle starts (u know what cycle, don’t u)

Using International Bodies and Signs
Palang Merah (Red Cross ~ Heard this in Indonesia)
Red Crescent (if you are in Islamic countries)
Call 999, we’ve got a bush on fire! That bush is on fire (Semak dijilat api – kakakaka)
Call the ambulance, we’ve got a situation down here

Even without all those terms, one can still guess if a girl’s having her period (menstruation) or not by focusing on the following symptoms or words that come out from their mouth

~stomach pain
~had PMS earlier (Pre-menstrual Syndrome)
~can’t go swimming
~i’m bleeding

some uncommon ones
I’m making Bloody Mary now (even tho she’s not holding any glass)
My drain is leaking, i need to fix it

using financial terms
I’m in the red (bad loan, overdraft)

Techie Version
My server is down it’s been attacked by the Code Red Worm

Ok, if it’s from a Sex Worker, it might sound like this
Closed for business
Closed for maintenance
Red Carded (Just like soccer, kekekeke)
STOP ! Red Light!!!

To Boyfriend
It’s messy
I’m not pregnant will be the best music your ear will hear if you had unprotected sex and waiting for judgement day.
Not this time

To Husband
Not tonight, dear (also applicable for boyfriends)
Might just tell the husband straight away without using any indirect methods.

Now for the conclusion

Next time if someone who usually joins you for sports and suddenly says that she’s not going, probably there’s an alert on her system, RED ALERT.

Some girls are just not as open, and telling you if she’s having her monthly thing or not, but as a guy, we need to be considerate and don’t push too hard to get answers. =) Jadi, pandai-pandai lah!!

I wonder why those acidic liquid solution are labelled as feminine wash?

Is there any masculine ones out there?

7 thoughts on “CB RED ALERT

  1. Of course they use he feminine word if too direct then kena complaint ma. You can’t use Cibai Wash or Cunt wash . If I i’ll use “private part wash”. For masculine one you think we need those to wash our lanchiau meh? Use sabun or shower gel enough la

  2. kakakaka… bro, i wrote article frm 2am, until the end, already 3 am, my brain also slowed down abit, dats why I ask silly question like that, but anyhow.

    We use Sabun or Shower Gel, koz we don’t need to bleed. Once my friend told me to go to donate blood because donating blood is good, so that our body can replenish our own blood supply. He also mentioned that girls have an auto drip mode, so they don’t need to donate so often like guys do.

    Talking bout donating blood. I think I’m gonna write about that in future. 🙂

    But I remembered last time when I was like 4 years old, I washed my KuKu with saline solution, because I went for circumcision (sunat) that time (potong kulit). So that could be the only time a guy uses some kinda solution in his life time????

    Just to share..

  3. I did come across advertisment in local Malay Newspaper (Utusan Malaysia I guess) few months ago regarding personal wash for men. Forgot the brand name. Something starts with Q…. It is a “buatan Malaysia” herbal product, RM68, said to be effective in reducing bacterial count and make our kukuciao “lebih kuat & lebih tahan”. I don’t quite trust & believe it is just a gimmic product / marketing strategy.

  4. Q ? Quat ? Quality?

    I just slammed my balls while doing some body slamming in martial arts. Wakkks, so damn painful.

    Maybe I need the Q…. thing. Does it help relieve some pain as well?


  5. these fucking bots.. the A.I really kengcao.. delete those posts cibaiHuat.. those Ian, Tyrell all are bots. sipet tulan

  6. lol!!my gf at d very1st day asked me to buy pad,i didnt get it so she said buy kotex.aso didnt get then she said,u dnt know wat call period?!”haha

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